one of my new favorite things to do now is blog in bed... its nice to unwind this way. also, i'm playing around with the set up of the blog. who knows what it'll end up looking like...
my thursdays are supposed to be my easy days... i only have two classes. then i have discipleship, which is a blessing. and then i usually have a few hours to kill before rehearsal at like 6. one thing i love about college is that the weekend starts on thursday. unless i have a test on friday or an assignment due, i like to mentally shut off at about 8pm on thursdays for the weekend. the past few thursdays have a bit out of the ordinary...and although i haven't enjoyed them as much at the time, they have been really good for me. so tonight there was healing prayer night at wesley. for those who are skeptical, know that the Lord is still healing and wesley has a few nights a semester for people to come and be prayed over. tonight they asked the ArtSpeak ministry leaders, both visual arts and dance, to be a part of healing prayer. to be honest, when debating on going or not all I was concerned about were the Olympics... i mean, it was the figure skating finals... anyways, i went to the healing prayer to dance anyways and am so thankful now. recently my shins have really been bothering me, making dance less enjoyable and not really allowing me to do much running. well this week they have bothered me more again so i figured it wouldn't do any harm to have people pray for my shins to be healed. they prayed for them a few times and there was some improvement but then they started to ask me questions about myself and the spiritual season i am currently in. the past few weeks i have struggled with fully understanding and feeling the Lord's love for me. at wesley a few weeks ago, a director spoke about being a Son of God and not living as a Servant to God. that talk has wrecked me ever since. i realized that night that i do strive for the Lord's love...that i am living the life of a servant and not as a son. so this has been on my mind a lot the past month or so...trying to understand everything. i know that the Lord loves me because God is Love so He's naturally going to love his children. but i have recently seen the striving person in me and i'm learning daily how to accept the Lord's love- knowing that it has absolutely nothing to do with what i do, or what i don't do. anyways, at healing prayer tonight the people praying for me asked me about it...meaning the Lord gave them an idea of what was going on. it was very encouraging and i am very thankful that i went to healing prayer. its funny to me that something that is free and good is so hard for me to accept. i imagine God trying to tell me He loves me or even trying to show it to me, but i can't accept it because all i can think of is what i can be doing better.
i kinda just poured out a bit of my heart to you just now...i hope you were ready for that. sorry if you weren't. i guess i'm just looking forward to the day that i know, understand and Accept His love for me. and for me specifically.
so, while i may have missed the figure skating finals, i am thankful for nbcolympics.com so i can watch the re-cap.
my sister is coming into town tomorrow and i'm really excited to see her and show her around again.
until next time...
enjoy the Lord's love,
RRR
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