growing up.

i have an interview tomorrow. thankfully i'm not nervous about it, but as i get ready for the drive tomorrow (for the interview) i realize what i have done to prepare for it... my hoop nose ring is gone, my coral-colored nail polish is off as well. all my belongings are now in a black "business" purse and my heels are ready to be worn. don't get me wrong, i like wearing business clothes but i can't help but wonder: what am i sacrificing now for an uncertain future? i guess what i'm saying is that i love being unique, i love having quirks and differences. i love that other people are different too...but preparing for this interview, i had to put all of that aside and look how the world thinks i should look. as things around me are changing quicker than i can even process, where have i put myself? i walked in one of my favorite vintage stores today and found killer vintage sunglasses. i thought they looked great on me- and they were on sale. but i didn't buy them. to be honest, i didn't know what the world would think of them. i'm embarrassed to admit that i let the world dictate my actions like that...but its what happened. this is one more phase of growing up that i'll have to adjust to. what does it look like to be unique and quirky in the business world? i almost want to ask if its okay to be quirky in the business world, but i know it is okay. what will it look like for me though? will i get a job where i can mix vintage pieces with my modern suit? will i work in an environment that allows me to be comfortable in my oxymoron state? i want that and more than that, i want to stay in the now and not begin conforming to the world because i think its the responsible thing to do... 3 months ago i would have bought those great sunglasses, but why not now? maybe i should title this self-reflection time...but i can't help but blame it on growing up.

reflections

since i only have one week of classes left, i have been reflecting on every semester throughout the last 4 years. naturally, i thought i could share my reflections with y'all...

my time at uga started in a late weekend in july at dawg camp. a camp for incoming freshman, it was a weekend to get to know some people before classes start. i loved dawg camp and am so glad i went back in 2006. not only did i have fun but i also met katie, my roommate now. for our friendship alone, i am glad i went! we were in red group #3, i'm pretty sure. i loved the games and competitions that we did throughout the weekend. although i'm pretty sure the black group won at the end of the weekend...

it was august 13th 2006 when i moved into creswell hall. david helped me pack up his dad's suburban and my dad squeezed in the back seat. moving my stuff in was stressful but the three of us got it done. i met my roommate samantha that day too! we had varsity for lunch and before i knew it, i was left alone in my dorm room. room 363 on hall 3D. i loved my room and quickly loved the girls on my hall. that same night katie picked me up and some dawg camp people went to starbucks and hung out on north campus. those were the days when i hated coffee and got a hot chocolate instead. i remember it being a hot august day and practically sweating & drinking hot chocolate, haha!

one of my all time favorite weekends in the fall was october 6 & 7. october 6 was a friday, i remember i had a pre-cal exam and did well on it. and the student alumni association had an event at the bookstore that i went to... i got my picture with hairy dawg and got vince dooley's autograph. it doesn't seem like such a big deal now, but at the time i was excited! that night melissa came into town and so did david. the next day, the 7th, was the georgia/tennessee game so my parents and aunt misti came into town on saturday. i think it was perfect timing to have family come to see me. if you don't remember, georgia lost to tennessee and it was a painful game to watch but nonetheless, it was a great weekend. i remember being proud to be on my own and proud to show off my dorm room, haha. pretty funny to think about now...

oh, freshman year. when everything was new and things were just beginning. i'm thankful to still have good friends from freshman year and have been there with me through it all.

choice

so, its tuesday. this tuesday has just been "one of those days." i hate to say it, but its true. i had a lot due today, and didn't feel prepared for much...i have lots on my mind and its been threatening rain all day. as i'm typing, it doesn't seem like much but its just "one of those days." and the worst part about these kind of days, for me, is the reality that its a choice to let these days get me down. i know that its a choice. i know that i can change my mind set...but these days make it that much harder. its these days that tempt me to avoid praying and asking God to help me. i don't want to ask Him for help... i should be able to handle it on my own, right? (wrong.) obviously this is far from true but its what i tend to think. so this adds to the theme of the day and it cycles through. i need to get out of this cycle, even if it is awful weather or rude customers walk into the office. the Lord is consistent. He doesn't change. He is the same today with rain, that He'll be tomorrow with sunshine. add it to the list of things i don't understand about the Lord...and to the list of truths I need to hold onto daily. He doesn't give us more than we can handle but it seems He likes to push us to the edge. probably so we'll re-focus on Him, which is where i tend to fail. so, as i type this blog and try to forget about the worries of this day and the days to come, i am trying to re-focus my attention, heart, mind and thoughts on the Lord. He is good. He loves me, regardless of today. He has purpose for me. He can help me.

i love...part 2

things i love:

-i love dressing in business clothes. it makes me excited about my future job and happy to be a management major...you may need to remind me of this when i complain about my classes in the next 2 weeks...

-i love banquets. i loved the sports banquet in high school, i always loved going to luncheons with my mom growing up and i still love them now. i look forward to banquets for my friends, husband and kids. yes, its true.

-i love that in the south, the only beverage on the table at banquets and luncheons is tea. thats all to be said.

-i still love hearing "The University of Georgia" and i still love hearing people talk about it and calling it "a great institution"

-i love my on-campus job. this year i've had the opportunity to meet lots of people in my office and department and its been a lot of fun. add it to the list of things i'm sad to leave.

-i love that my family is planning this wedding around sports. this week my mom asked me to look up more sporting events to make sure they didn't interfere... thankfully melissa and alex have picked the only off-week in UT's schedule and its after the ryder cup and before the world series. the guests should be happy...did i mention that UGA has a football game on this date? yeah, looks like the MOH will be sacrificing...it'll be worth it though.

-i love that i'll always be learning about sports. its one of the few things i'm excited to learn more about everyday.

-i love the way my room is set up...and i even love my crazy way of organizing in it. i can only hope that my husband will love the method to my madness too. a girl can hope, right?

-i love old things. there are few things that i'd prefer buying new (one being shoes, for example). i love old furniture, i love older cars, i love older clothing styles, i love older homes and i usually love most old, simple jewelry. i don't know if this is was more nature than nurture (sometimes i wonder that about myself) but either way, i love older things.

thats enough for today. right now i love my bed and i love that tomorrow is friday. what i don't love is that our language only has one word for "love"...naturally that makes me want to use it less, but i can't help it. oh well.